


I should have knocked first!

by HPfanatic12



Category: Night at the Museum (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Humor, JEDTAVIUS, M/M, Sex, it's not graphic don't worry, the 3rd couple is a surprise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 04:57:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17318513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HPfanatic12/pseuds/HPfanatic12
Summary: In which Nicky walks in on three couples doing the do





	I should have knocked first!

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little something I thought up to get my creative juices flowing for my other NATM story. I hope yall like it!

Nicky strolled the museum, whistling low under his breath and hands shoved deep into his pockets. Life at the museum was at a peak since the whole tablet rusting incident. Ahkmenrah only lasted a few months at the London museum before he was overwhelmed by sadness. He talked with his parents and Tilly arranged with Dr. McPhee to bring Ahk back to the New York museum, along with Lancelot who begged not to be left to be a mere statue again. As compassionate as he was due to being forced in his sarcophagus for so long, Ahk agreed he should come along, should Tilly not mind. The Londoner didn’t care, though Nicky wasn’t sure _what_ she cared about besides eligible bachelors and pizza. Ahk’s parents preferred to stay in London and bid their son a goodbye with hopes of seeing him again.

The reunion was bittersweet. The museum occupants were overjoyed at being ‘alive’ again, leading to a mass of hugs and tears. Somehow, Nicky was able to convince his dad to return to his night guard position _and_ suggest to McPhee that he should hire Tilly as well for added security. Amazingly, the curator was all for it. He had adjusted rather well to the idea that the exhibits came to life every night, well, after his brief fainting episodes which Nicky certainly never caught on tape.

In addition to that was the romance. Being still for so long made them yearn for physical contact. Everything was heightened, like and animal in heat. His dad tried to shield him from it most days and lectured them about proper conduct but they, besides Teddy and Sac, were about as careless as teenagers and could be found involved in a heated kiss or worse, but he had yet to come across that, thankfully.

Nicky wandered around, bored. It was a warm summer night, around ten in the evening. Summer was the worst because it meant the museum closed later and his friends couldn't come alive until much later, leaving them less time to roam. He decided to go upstairs and visit Ahk, the mummy usually came up with great ideas to cure his boredom, not all were approved by his dad but that hardly mattered.

He finished jogging up the stairs and rounded the corner, almost instantly his face formed a frown. The lights to the Egyptian exhibit were off. How odd. Ahk rarely left his lights off because it reminded him of the times before his dad left him out. Oh well, maybe he probably had a good reason, the teenager shrugged. He’d just turn them on in case it was a mistake.

It was when he flipped the light switch that his jaw dropped and he froze in utter horror. There on the floor was his dad and Ahk, caught in a moment of passion. His dad’s arms were wrapped around Ahk’s waist and he was shirtless. Ahk was stripped of his top where with a thin, white sheet covering their lower half (Nicky didn’t want to know what was under there). They turned to stare, his dad horrified and mortified while Ahk was indifferent.

“Yes? Did you need something, Nicky?” Ahk asked him calmly.

“Dude,” Nicky blurted out, making the blush on his dad’s cheeks redder. “Seriously? _Here_?”

His dad crushing on the former pharaoh was never a secret, it was always bluntly obvious and he never had a problem with them dating. His life, his choice. But that didn’t mean he could do the do whatever he pleased!

“Yes and?” Ahk asked like it was no big deal.

“You couldn’t have picked somewhere, I dunno, _private_?”

“It _was_ private until you barged in,” Ahk retorted.

His dad finally decided to speak. “Uh, could you, uh, let us have a moment please, Nicky? We’ll, uh, be out in a minute.”

Ahk checked under the sheet, lifting his head back up a second later. “It’ll be much more than a minute.”

“Gaaah,” Nicky turned on his heels, ignoring his dad’s frantic calls. _I’m never gonna unhear that!_

Maybe he’d see what Jed and Octavius were up to, a close second to Ahk, they were two of the funnest exhibits in the whole museum. Nicky liked to hear war stories and show them the entertainment of the modern world. It was because of him that the two became addicted to cat videos.

He practically jumped off the last two stairs, shaking his head profusely in order to rid himself of the God awful images. Was this punishment? If so, he regretted every single bad deed he ever did.

His shoes squeaked on the recently cleaned floor as he made his way to the Hall of Miniatures. Maybe he’d tell Jed and Octavius about what he’d just seen. Jed would have a good laugh. Octavius would probably scold him for being less than tactful but the general couldn’t fool him, ever since his friendship (and later relationship) with Jed formed, he’d loosened up a lot, gotten into more mischif now that Jed was there to influence him and basically stopped being such a stick in the mud.

Speaking of their relationship...Nicky already knew that they were exclusive. Actually, he was the first to know. He’d eavesdropped on them confessing their feelings when they came back from the British museum. It was pretty emotional. Nicky’s heart broke for the two miniatures. They poured their hearts out even though they knew they would be nothing but statues for who knows how long. Still, he had to hand it to them, they had an epic make out session before sunrise.

He blew out a puff of air, arriving at the hall. He wasn't sure if they were out exploring yet or they were visiting the other in their separate dioramas. Oh well, he’d check both. Unfortunately, they were nowhere to be found. He spotted a westerner and waved at him.

“Have you seen Jed and Octavius?” he asked.

The man shrugged. “Not since bout five, ten minutes ago.”

“Well do you know where they went?”

This time, the man answered with a bright, mischievous grin. “Dunno bout that but I do know they were rushin off mighty fast if ya know what I mean.”

Nicky didn’t but thanked the man anyway and went off in the opposite direction, wondering how to decipher that. The heck did he mean? Jed oftentimes dragged Octavius into his schemes so maybe that was it. Nicky chuckled, picturing the look on his dad’s face when he had to deal with Jed’s latest idea. He remembered the first time Jed and Octavius were allowed to use the computer; this was before they started watching cat videos so they searched up random sites, accidentally coming across a porn blog. The teenager grinned. Boy did they get the shock of their lives. Octavius was visibly embarrassed but Jed wasn’t. The westner whistled and wanted to look at more but his dad intervene and shut off the computer for the rest of the night.

Honestly it was never truly boring at the museum.

Nicky sat at the front desk, feet propped up. He rummaged for his phone that was secured in his pocket, mindlessly flipping through social media. Before long, he tossed his phone to the side, leaning back in the chair. What to do, what to do. While it may have been true that most nights were very lively, right now he was bored, bored, bored!

Until something caught his attention. He could’ve sworn he heard...moaning? He turned his head wildy, trying to catch the owner of the noise. Nothing. No one else was around. Maybe he was just imagining things.

He shrugged and went back to doing nothing. But then, he heard it again! This time it was louder, slightly muffled. Okay, he definitely heard something. He checked his phone, maybe some kind of video was playing. Nope. The computer was off and the only TV that was used was currently in the basement until their next movie night. The teenager was stumped. Where on earth was the sound coming from?

Whatever it was, it could wait. Maybe he’d get on the computer and scroll around for a while until Jed and Octavius came back from wherever they went. He tried using the mouse but the batteries were dead. The only ones were the bottom drawer. After struggling to get the blasted thing open, he reached down to open the drawer, letting out a groan of frustration at what he saw.

Jed and Octavius were _doing it_ , quite shamelessly, he might add, in a _drawer_.  He tore his eyes away upon noticing their lack of clothing. Jed only wore his cowboy hat and Octavius was was just bare. He covered his face with his hands. First Ahk and his dad, now this?

“Hey, what’s the big idea?” Jed hollered up, hands on his very bare hips. “What’s a fella gotta do to get a little privacy in this place?”

Unlike his dad, Octavius didn’t react like a squealing schoolgirl. He calmly reached for his cape to cover his waist and stood up next to his boyfriend, looking up at Nicky. The teenager wished he could've extended the gesture to Jed as well but the cowboy was perfectly okay with being seen in the nude. “You could have knocked,” he said in his no-nonsense tone.

“What are you two doing?” Nicky practually hissed.

The two men shared a glance before looking back up at him. “Didn't yer dad have this talk with ya already?” Jed raised his eyebrows.

Nicky glared.

“Aw c’mon, Nicky. Wasn’t like we was doin it out in the open.”

“Yes,” Octavius added, sounding high and mighty despite the situation. “I do not believe we were doing anything wrong.”

“Well no,” Nicky was forced to admit, looking anywhere but down there. “But I just walked in on Ahk and dad doing it so cut me some slack, okay? I’m traumatized.”

Octavius and Jed snorted at his expense. Nicky glared, offended, which only made them laugh harder.

“It’s not funny,” he grumbled.

“It’s a hoot!” Jed laughed. “Boy oh boy. Good for Ahk and Larry, though. Bout time.”

“Yes,” Octavius nodded. “They’ve been skirting around the subject for far too long.”

“You right, Toga Boy. Wonder if Larry solved that erection problem he’s been having?”

“ _Okay_ ,” Nicky cringed. “I’ve heard enough, thanks.”

They grinned at him, feigning innocence.

“Ugh, you guys suck,” he scowled.

“We also swallow,” Jed smirked.

“That’s it!” he slammed the drawer shut. They shouted at him, probably because of the noise and the jostle but he didn’t care. He just knew he needed to get away from this sex. Seriously, it was like mating time at the zoo! He walked off, wondering how to face everyone later after they finished pleasing themselves. He really didn’t have a problem with sex and wasn’t super bashful of the subject like some of his classmates were but that didn’t mean he wanted to witness his friends, basically family, doing it.

He was near the African exhibit, anticipating Dexter. The capuchin was everywhere but more so around this area as this was his ‘home’. Dexter gave his dad a lot of crap but was pretty easy on him, something his dad expressed his irritation about.

He thought about going in and seeing some of the lions. Ahk showed him how harmless they really were after a chin scratch. They were basically big house cats that wanted lots of attention. And who could say they got to pet a lion? Not many.

Just as he stepped in, he noticed Laa and Tilly were in the corner, giggling. Laa had his hairy hands on Tilly’s, erm, big chest and the blonde was moaning like Jed had been doing minutes before. They looked like they were about to go further, not noticing Nicky’s presence.

“Oh my god, whyyy?" 


End file.
